


I closed my eyes and closed myself and closed my world and never opened up to anything

by jvngfs



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-12
Updated: 2015-11-12
Packaged: 2018-05-01 07:24:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5197349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jvngfs/pseuds/jvngfs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Woohyun hosts illegal poker games and he invites Sunggyu to join him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I closed my eyes and closed myself and closed my world and never opened up to anything

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this at the same time I was writing ASHS and I was watching The Genius so the themes are pretty similar. And also because I like to write strange things.

The sky is covered by low dark clouds and the air is chill enough to make Sunggyu shivers. He's walking fast, burying his nose in the collar of his coat and trying to ignore the cars loudly horning beside him. It's always like that in the morning; hurried people going to work and loud noises filling up the city. Sunggyu is going to work too but Sunggyu likes to walk rather than driving. 

He works at a games selling shop. He has been hired there a few years ago - after graduating - and found it quite pleasant, at least better than what he imagined working at a regular company would be like.

The most popular items are the cards. Sunggyu sells decks and decks of cards everyday. They're small enough to fit in a pocket and yet you can play tones of games with them; that's why people like them so much, Sunggyu likes to think. They're easy and entertaining.

Sunggyu, on the contrary, prefers dices games. He likes playing with his luck, he likes the thrill rushing through him as the dice rolls on the table until it swings into a stop. 

However, Sunggyu doesn't have many chances to play. He spends most of his time sitting behind the shop small counter or organizing the games he's selling. Sometimes he advices customers on what games to choose or explain to little kids why Scrabble isn't as boring as they think it is, but Sunggyu rarely plays himself.

He can distinguish what kind of games people like to play as soon as they make the bell of his shop ring. There are the busy mothers who buy games to appease their sulky children, there are the grandparents looking for the rarest and funniest games to please their grandchildren, there are the families wanting games to play on holidays, there are the teenagers who seek for role-playing games and then there's Sunggyu, who knows by heart the rules and strategies to every single game but doesn't play that much. 

He likes his job though. It doesn't pay that well but he can spend his days in the small cozy place, surrounded by boxes of games and toys and it is greatly satisfying for him who always liked to play.

 

There isn't many customers yet but today is the day when he gets his delivery of new games. The big truck usually parks at the back of the shop and Sunggyu helps Dongwoo taking the boxes of new games out of the trunk before organizing them on their shelves. 

Dongwoo is right on time, as always, and shakes his hand enthusiastically. They became quite close over the years. They usually spend a few minutes talking and drinking coffee before Dongwoo leaves. He comes once every week and he is always cheerful and ready to tease Sunggyu when he's complaining about his work. 

However, today Dongwoo has something to tell him. He waits until they're done with the games and they're leaning against the wall, smoking and drinking coffee. Usually it's the time when Dongwoo talks about his boyfriend or about something that happened to him during the week and they share a few jokes. Today is different.

Today, Dongwoo makes Sunggyu an offer. "How well do you play poker?," he asks, casually at first, and Sunggyu answers that he's alright. The few times he played with his friends he won and he is familiar with the rules, like he is familiar with every game he sells.

"There's a guy I know who sets up underhand games once a week. There's a lot of money going on. Thought you might be interested," he looks at Sunggyu expectantly, face suddenly serious and eyes alert. Sunggyu always knew Dongwoo was one to get himself into clandestine stuff - he saw the strange packets in his trunk more than once - but he didn't expect him to offer so bluntly.

"I don't know, I'm not so much into this. It can be dangerous," Sunggyu argues weakly because he needs the money. He wants to buy himself a car and the shop doesn't pay as much as he would like it to. He has other projects, other things he dreams of doing, out of this place, out of this life.

So it happens like this at first, with Sunggyu accepting because he is blinded by easy money and because the only thing he's confident in are games, and also because Sunggyu misses playing. He doesn't know why Dongwoo chose him to be a part of it. Maybe he sensed that Sunggyu would accept such deal.

At first he only agrees to try it out, to not bet too much money, only the few hundred dollars he was saving for his car. But it's already enough.

 

The meeting is set in an old factory at night. It's not that far away from where Sunggyu is working and he can go by feet. It's already pitch dark outside when he closes the shop and hand wrapped tightly around his money in his pocket, he walks to the factory with light steps. 

Sunggyu has always been good with numbers and with games. He knows he can make it. He just needs a few thousand dollars to buy a car, after all. One or two wins and he'll be good. That's what he thinks rather carelessly.

 

Men are seated around a table and if it wasn't for the single light bud above them, they wouldn't see anything. Sunggyu takes the seat next to a guy who looks slightly nervous about what will happen and tries his best to wait patiently, continuously glancing at the unusual surroundings. Sunggyu isn't used to this kind of atmosphere, nor is he comfortable with it.

"When are we starting?" One of them asks and Sunggyu flinches. He needs to keep his calm to be able to do good but he isn't feeling that relaxed, probably because he never found himself in such situation before. 

"We're waiting for Woohyun," another answers as he seems to inspect his chips. Sunggyu's legs are trembling under the table and his fingers are as stiff as if they were paralyzed. 

After a few minutes of heavy silence only broke by some whispers here and there, the guy who Sunggyu assumes is Woohyun enters. Sunggyu's heart flips in his chest when he sees him for the first time. He looked tired, face pale and thin body but his eyes are fierce and dig hole in Sunggyu's skin. He tries not to stare too much but it's hard when Woohyun is sitting right in front of him and his lips twitch into a smirk. Sunggyu feels sweat drip down his spine and he isn't sure he's going to manage to play poker well enough to win. He has to though, he can't disappoint Woohyun.

"Let's start," Woohyun announces after he greeted everyone and his voice is low and his tone flat. Sunggyu shivers. 

He shuffles the deck of cards with expert hands and Sunggyu watches him carefully. And as he starts dealing out the cards, Sunggyu's heart races in his chest. It's really starting. He doesn't need to see Woohyun play to tell he's good. He heard the other players praising him, calling him a legend around here and he feels strangely intimidated. He will have to do his best if he wants to win. He needs to win.

He takes a peek at his cards and there aren't shitty but not that good either, but he will manage. He can already tell by the face the man on his right made when he received his cards that he sucks. It shouldn't be that hard.

And then the game really begins and no matter how many times Sunggyu glances toward Woohyun, his face remains unchanged, his cheeky smile long forgotten to be replaced by a straight and calm expression. 

The betting starts and Sunggyu tries to stay focused, to build his hand and to strategize the best he can. It's hard when his mind is a bit confused and Woohyun's head keeps jerking upward toward him.

 

The game drags on and it's almost completely quiet except for the players announcing their moves. Sunggyu has a good hand, not an amazing one but a good one and Woohyun seems to have one too because the pot keeps growing and Sunggyu isn't sure he wants to keep up. But he has to win for his car. So when the showdown comes and they're the only two left, Sunggyu holds Woohyun's gaze and tries not to show his anxiousness when they are asked to reveal their hands.

 

Woohyun wins. Woohyun wins and the man next to him curses out loud. Sunggyu wants to cry or to run away but either way he can't believe he just lost so much money. He was confident with winning, he really was even though Woohyun's reputation spoke for itself.

 

Sunggyu is about to leave after giving all his money to Woohyun who smiled at him and said "thank you" and he was so angry he could have punched him, when Woohyun stops him right when he's passing the door of the factory. "Hey, you should come again next week," he tells him casually like he would ask a friend. Sunggyu stiffens.

"Why should I? I already lost everything." He meant it to be biting and mean but Woohyun just chuckles like it's no big deal. Sunggyu's fists clench in his pockets and he's about to add something when Woohyun interrupts.

"You don't know, maybe you'll win next time," he says with a shrug and Sunggyu scoffs. He doesn't have money nor time to waste but Woohyun doesn't seem to care, already leaving to go back to the factory and Sunggyu follows his silhouette for a few seconds, intrigued and annoyed but somehow fascinated.

That's how his story with Woohyun started, that's how he grew an interest in him, with a simple poker game and a huge loss of money.

\--

Sunggyu doesn't want to go back. He really doesn't. He hated the steamy atmosphere and the sickening smell of cigarettes and cheap beer. He hated even more Woohyun's gaze fixed on him and the way he smirked at him the whole time like he was perfectly aware of what was going on in Sunggyu's head. Sunggyu doesn't want to go back but he's jumping on his seat the whole day, stomach twisting every time his mind wanders back to the past night and to Woohyun laughing and looking way too young for what he's doing.

Sunggyu doesn't want to admit he enjoyed the thrill. He doesn't want to surrender and let himself fall back into Woohyun's trap, because it was exactly what it felt like; being trapped in a small room with Woohyun staring at him and his clammy fingers curled around his cards. 

 

Sunggyu is still thinking about it three days later and his customers must notice he is distracted because they sigh at him a lot. Sunggyu apologizes and tries to focus on his work but he can't really when his thoughts are still stuck to Woohyun's Adam's apple bobbing as he slams his last hand on the table. 

 

Sunggyu is almost about to give up and to call Dongwoo to ask for a seat for the next night, despite his lack of money and his first lost, when Woohyun actually shows up at his shop. It's late in the evening and Sunggyu is about to close when the bell rings and he doesn't have the time to warn the customer that he'll be closing in a few minutes before Woohyun's amused voice resound behind him. 

"So this is where you're working." He looks around him, amazed at the colorful games displayed around him and at the moving figurines on the tables. Sunggyu almost feels like backing up in the corner of the room as he is so surprised to see Woohyun suddenly appear in front of him. He wonders for a second if he came to ask for money or something else but he doesn't look threatening at all, running his hand over the Monopoly board next to him.

"What are you doing here?," Sunggyu asks, hurrying up to shut the door and to hang the "closed" sign. He wouldn't like someone entering the shop while he's talking with Woohyun about illegal poker games but Woohyun doesn't seem to care much, leaning comfortably against the shelves and looking at Sunggyu with an amused face. 

"I came to see you, of course," he says and Sunggyu tenses. He doesn't like the tone of his voice nor the way he seems to be perfectly aware of Sunggyu's discomfort. 

"Why is that? Do you need something? Is is about Dongwoo?" Sunggyu hears his own voice shakes slightly and prays that Dongwoo didn't get in trouble. Thankfully, Woohyun just smiles at him like he's being funny.

"It's a nice shop you have here," he says suddenly, stopping in front of an alien statue and traveling his fingers over its head. "I didn't expect you to have such a nice and peaceful life when I saw you the other night," he adds then and Sunggyu snorts.

"You don't seem really good at reading people," Sunggyu draws closer, "It's a bit of a shame for someone who plays poker." Sunggyu didn't mean to be cheeky but Woohyun's eyebrows lift and he seems surprised by Sunggyu's boldness. He isn't offended though, letting out a small laugh and turning around to face him. 

"That's why I don't play fairly," he states and for a second Sunggyu thinks it's a joke but Woohyun is looking at him expectantly, eyes twinkling. 

"What do you mean?" he questions a bit stupidly. He isn't sure he is understanding what Woohyun is trying to say.

"I mean I cheat when I play poker. That's why you lost so badly the other day," his tone is casual and his head cocked like he would do if he was asking about the weather. Sunggyu takes a step backward, stunned, not sure if Woohyun is being serious or not and more importantly why is he coming here to tell him that after scamming him of a few hundred dollars. For a minute, he hesitated to punch him and to send him off his shop but then he remembers that Woohyun is probably stronger and more used to fighting than he is. "Why are you so surprised?," Woohyun laughs next, teeth showing and obviously finding Sunggyu's reaction rather comical. 

"Did you come to tell me that? Do you want to give me my money back?" Sunggyu stammers, already planning how he will get revenge on Dongwoo but Woohyun just keeps laughing. 

"No. I came here to ask you to work with me," his eyes are now burning and are fixed on Sunggyu's face who can't help but divert his gaze. 

"Work with you?," he repeats, scowling and his tone becoming clipped. "I don't scam people. I'm sorry." 

He knew it was a bad idea to go there from the start but now Woohyun is in his shop and he's offering him easy money and he's still looking straight at him.

Sunggyu would be lying if he said he never dreamed of having a more interesting life. He would be lying if he didn't dream of handfuls of banknotes and a nice house next to the sea. It's exhilarating what Woohyun is promising. It makes his heart beats fast when Woohyun says he's good at poker and he wants to play with him. Sunggyu wants to refuse, wants to tell him to leave and go back to his monotonous life but he needs a car - the red one he always wanted to buy - and Woohyun is saying that it's not that risky, that they could work well together. So Sunggyu accepts, his hand trapped into Woohyun's one and with a small bow of his head.

\--

For Sunggyu, the days before the next game are made of fear so strong it makes him paranoid, jumping on his seat each time a customer enters his shop and of excitement so powerful he can't sleep properly, counting the hours remaining before the d-day.

Woohyun sends a few texts, telling him not to worry, that they will make it if they know how to keep their calm, that he should just act like he always do, not to draw any attention. 

When Dongwoo comes, Sunggyu doesn't say anything about Woohyun. He only tells him about how he lost miserably and how he will go again to try to win back his money. Dongwoo pats him on the shoulder, wishing him good luck and advising him to be careful. Sunggyu answers that he will only plays until he gets enough to buy his car. 

 

Woohyun's way of cheating is easy if not childish, something a professional wouldn't fall for but he is playing in a factory with people gullible enough to bet huge amounts of money in such games.

It all lies in the card deal-out. It's the easiest way to cheat Woohyun teaches him, unless the players are really used to these kind of things, they won't know. Sunggyu is a bit skeptical but follows anyway. Woohyun sounds confident, trusting Sunggyu they will make it and just like that Sunggyu finds himself seated in the exact same chair in the same factory but with different opponents. 

Woohyun's gaze has changed again, switching from mischievousness to seriousness and he isn't laughing anymore, ambition and greed glinting in his eyes. Sunggyu shifts by his side and tries to keep a blank face, fiddling absentmindedly with his cards.

 

When Woohyun slams his last hand of cards on the table and it's a full house, Sunggyu feels adrenaline rush through his veins. He barely holds back his smile and has a hard time acting like he's surprised. The other players look defeated, cursing under their breath and throwing their money on the table. Woohyun gathers it before leading the others to the door. 

Sunggyu, on the contrary, lets his head fall against the table as a sense of euphoria takes over him. They did it. He did it. They won lots of money tonight, much more than what he earns for working a full month at the shop. He's going to be able to buy himself a car.

Sunggyu is still resting against the wooden table, eyes wandering around the forgotten chips when Woohyun comes back and squeezes his shoulder with his hand. Sunggyu raises his head to look at him and he's smiling. "See, I told you we could make it," he teases and Sunggyu wishes he would keep his warm hand on his shoulder for a little longer.

"How much did we make?," he asks avidly, glancing toward the money Woohyun is still holding. The bank notes are dirty and crumpled but it is more than Sunggyu ever saw. 

"A few hundreds," Woohyun says as he sits next to him to start counting. Sunggyu watches carefully, following the way Woohyun's hands moves to fold the notes and his lips part to mouth the numbers. Finally, Woohyun cuts the wad in half and hands it to him. Sunggyu takes it and hurries himself to hide them deep in his pocket. It is enough to pay back what he lost last time and a bit more. 

"Thanks," Sunggyu mutters, about to get up to leave. He suddenly feels really tired and doesn't want to spend more time than necessary in this scary factory.

"Wait-," Woohyun calls before he has a chance to, "Wait for me, I'll buy you dinner." He offers and Sunggyu is about to refuse but Woohyun already grabbed his hand and is dragging him to the exit. 

 

He brings him to a little shop on the streets where they can sit and eat for cheap. It's a bit ironical knowing that they just earned hundreds of dollars in a few hours but Sunggyu doesn't protest because it has been a long time since he ate outside of his apartment. Woohyun orders meat and noodles and a bottle of alcohol. Sunggyu wants to protest because he's working tomorrow and he didn't agree to get drunk tonight but Woohyun smiles at him and tells him they should celebrate. 

"What are you going to do with the money?," Sunggyu inquires once they've started eating and Woohyun already has his mouth full. He isn't that curious but he doesn't know much about Woohyun; what he's doing for a living, how he came with the idea of hosting poker games, where he learned such skills. 

"I don't know yet," he mutters, "Probably paying my late rent and buy myself some good food." He chuckles like he just gave him the definition of happiness. Sunggyu nods, wondering why Woohyun has late rents when he's having poker nights every weeks. "And you? Are you going to invest in the shop?"

"Me? No. I'm going to buy a car," he announces and Woohyun seems impressed. He pours him another glass of alcohol before talking.

"You'll have to do many games to earn enough to buy a car," he notes.

"It'll still be faster than with what I get at the shop." 

Sunggyu empties his glass and Woohyun starts asking him how he decided to get hired into a game shop, how he managed to become so good at poker, how he met Dongwoo. Sunggyu answers diligently, asking back about Woohyun's life who avoids most questions but listens to everything Sunggyu has to say. 

When it's late at night and they have no alcohol left to drink and Sunggyu's world is spinning, Woohyun calls it a night. They stand up and Woohyun is as drunk as he is, laughing loudly and repeating that tonight was amazing. They help each other walking by leaning against the other and Sunggyu isn't sure he's warm because of the alcohol or because of Woohyun's body pressed so close to him.

"I'm going this way," Woohyun says once they've reached an intersection and the first lights of the dawn are appearing, coloring the streets in a steel blue glow. 

"I'll see you soon then," Sunggyu greets but his voice raises at the end like he's asking. 

"Sure, I'll call you." Woohyun smiles and turns around, walking the opposite way and Sunggyu wants to call him back but it's already late, he's still drunk and he should be sleeping. It still hurts somewhere deep inside his chest to look at Woohyun's silhouette getting smaller and smaller in the far back.

\--

Sunggyu has to wait another week before he hears from Woohyun again. He's informing him with a text that the next game will take place tonight. Sunggyu is jumpy all afternoon, heart racing, body prickling and impatient like he has never been.

It is both nerve-wracking and thrilling how Woohyun doesn't contact him for days like he forgot about him but then send a text that makes Sunggyu shake with anticipation.

Sunggyu has never felt lonely or found his shop suffocating before. He used to enjoy the stuffy room filled with too many objects and colors. Now, he can't stop thinking about the night he spent with Woohyun outside, about the empty streets they walked on, about the wide dark sky above their heads and about Woohyun's laugh reverberating in his ears. 

 

Woohyun is late to start the game as usual, chatting with the players like he always does and Sunggyu wonders how he finds them, but when he comes sit next to Sunggyu his hand disappears under the table and comes to squeeze his knee lightly, in such a familiar way that Sunggyu barely represses his smile before the game is starting and he's getting lost into the numbers and colors dancing in front of his eyes. 

 

When it's over and he has the money secured in his pocket, he thinks he might get used to see Woohyun every week, to play with him that way, because Woohyun is singular and perfect in all kind of ways. He's everything that makes Sunggyu craves for his attention and grows obsessed over him.

"Want to get grab something to eat?," Woohyun offers as they escape the factory and the wind brushes their hair softly. Sunggyu accepts and saying he didn't wait for it would be lying. There is something fascinating about Woohyun, something that makes him want to hang onto him and to agree to everything he's offering, something that makes Sunggyu weak.

Sunggyu is aware that Woohyun might be having some kind of interest in him or else he wouldn't do it but he likes the attention. He likes everything about it, even the illegal stuff and the way Woohyun never talks about himself and probably hides tons of dirt under his silence.

\--

"Love doesn't really mean a thing around here anyway," Dongwoo tells him when he asks about Woohyun that week but Sunggyu is sure it's love that he's feeling. A mutual and intense love. Love that makes him do crazy things because he'll do anything for Woohyun. Love so pure and so real it makes him explode with happiness.

\--

Woohyun is waiting for him tonight, leaning against the entrance with his hoodie over his head but Sunggyu recognizes him anyway. His silhouette and his whole peculiar attitude betrays him. Sunggyu already knows that much. "What are you doing here?," he asks lightly as he approaches and Woohyun's head jerks upward. His face breaks into a smile.

"I was waiting for you," he answers, throwing his arm around his shoulders in such a natural way that Sunggyu barely registers it.

"We don't go inside?" He is a bit surprised as Woohyun never waited for him outside before. He was always inside, nodding to Sunggyu when he was entering and only allowing them to chat after they finished the game.

"Not today. There's no game today." Woohyun announces happily, bumping playfully into him.

"What? What do you mean? Why did you ask me to come then?" Sunggyu blinks, a bit lost and wondering if Woohyun wants to stop everything but Woohyun just seems happy, relaxed even.

"Don't worry," he reassures him, "We'll just do something else this week." 

Woohyun seems a bit more cheerful than usual, his hand resting on Sunggyu's shoulder and being all excited. "Where do you want to go?," he asks as he's dragging Sunggyu to his car. Sunggyu tries to ignore the flip of his stomach and the hotness of his face. He isn't used to Woohyun being like this around him. He is used to Woohyun's still face as they're playing and then Woohyun's jokes and drunken laughter. He doesn't know the touchy and enthusiastic Woohyun he's facing right now. He likes him too however.

Sunggyu thinks about Woohyun's question for long seconds. He never really thought about going anywhere. His whole life has always been about going to work and then going back home. A chill runs down his spine. "The beach," he says because he has never been there and he heard beautiful depictions. 

Woohyun frowns and then hits him playfully on the shoulder. "We'll go another time, it's too far to go now."

"Why did you ask where I wanted to go then?," Sunggyu retorts a bit sulkily because Woohyun always does what he wants anyway. Woohyun stays quiet for a few minutes until they reach the car and he motions for Sunggyu to sit inside. Sunggyu doesn't though, not feeling like getting locked up inside yet. He wants to enjoy the chill of the night and Woohyun's arm around his shoulder for a bit longer.

The car is kind of old, it stinks and it isn't certain how long it will last. Nothing like the car Sunggyu's going to buy.

"Do you really want to go there?," he turns to look at him, soft strands of hair falling on his face and Sunggyu thinks he should stop staring one day because the more he stares, the hardest it is to stop. 

"Of course I want to go," Sunggyu huffs, "I wouldn't have said it if I didn't." Sunggyu looks at the factory and at the empty road streching away in front of them. "But we can go another time," he adds. Woohyun nods and his arm falls from his shoulder to hold his hand. 

"Should we go for a walk then?," he offers and Sunggyu agrees. He never really had a chance to walk around the streets much. It's quiet and scary at night and he never had someone to walk with him before. 

The streets are steep and some of them don't even have a proper lighting but it's fine because Woohyun is here with him, holding his hand tightly until their palms are moist and Sunggyu loves it. 

They stop at a shop to buy some snacks and eats them on a bench. 

Woohyun keeps talking about useless things but Sunggyu listens anyway, not expecting him to say anything really relevant anyway. It doesn't matter what Woohyun is saying as long as he says it to Sunggyu. Woohyun doesn't look like he would talk about himself easily but he doesn't need to because just hanging out that way and seeing Woohyun laugh with his mouth open seems realer than any deep conversations they could have. 

"You're very different when it's just the two of us," Sunggyu mentions after a while and Woohyun lets out an awkward chuckle, diverting his eyes like he doesn't want to talk about it. "Why are you acting this way?" Sunggyu teases him but he's really curious because as he watches him now, he wonders where the serious Nam Woohyun has gone to, the one who does illegal activities and is a poker genius.

Woohyun sighs, his eyes scrunching shut in coyness, "I'm acting with the others," he says. "I'm just myself now." It's a bit cocky but it works anyway because Sunggyu laughs at that, suddenly realizing that he doesn't know much about Woohyun beside for his name and how good he is at poker. Somehow it doesn't matter that much. 

 

Woohyun kisses him when they're about to part, with both hands cupping his cheeks and his full lips pressing against his own. The street is empty and so quiet he almost forgets where they are. Woohyun kisses him multiple times, arms leaving his face to wrap around him and Sunggyu gasps softly. He kisses back too, mouthing "i love you" in between and gripping Woohyun's clothes. 

When they separate, panting, Sunggyu stumbles backward, head dizzy and heart about to burst, he looks at Woohyun whose lips are parted and eyes hooded and he thinks he is the most beautiful person he ever met; so beautiful he doesn't look human and he can't believe how lucky he is. 

\--

Two months and thousands of dollars later, Woohyun warns him that they have to change the location. The factory is starting to draw attention and they don't want the police showing up one night. Sunggyu is worried, being not used to have to deal with such pressure and fear but Woohyun says it's fine, it's just to be prudent. He manages for make a deal with the town swimming pool's owner. He likes easy money, Woohyun says.

That night Woohyun promises him that he'll take him to the beach once they've earned enough to buy Sunggyu a car. Then they'll let go of the poker and leave this town for a while, just the two of them.

\--

Sunggyu thinks he might be addicted to the games' aftermath, when the adrenaline is leaving his veins and he's still shaking slightly and their hands close around the money. 

Tonight, Sunggyu counts carefully after the players are gone and it's just the two of them left. Because he knows. He was only missing a few hundred dollars for his car and they're almost there, a few games left and they will be free. Woohyun smiles at him, the same sense of achievement and urgency rushing through him. They're almost there.

They kiss hard and messily after that, hands tangled in hair and clothes and pushing against each other bodies like they want to merge with each other. Sunggyu is frantic with need, his hands reaching underneath Woohyun's sweater to roam around his back and Woohyun has to grab his hands to stop him. "Not here," he whispers under his ear and he drags him behind him, in a rush, to another room where the swimming material is stored. 

They don't have much time, they know, because the owner don't allow them to stay behind after the games are done but they don't really care now. It's sad in a way because Sunggyu wishes they could have done it in his room, under his white sheets and he could have taken his time to explore every curve of Woohyun's body but he's fine with that too, as long as he has Woohyun, as long as it's just the two of them.

Woohyun closes the door behind them and the room is dark except for a window overlooking the swimming pool. Sunggyu reaches for Woohyun again and it might be the thousandth time they kiss since they met but it still feels as new and as exhilarating that his heart flips every time. 

Woohyun kisses back, their tongues intertwining and he only steps back to take off his sweater. Sunggyu's hands meet his warm skin again and he can't help but stroke and touch every places he has access to. 

"I love you, I love you, I love you," Woohyun chants as he's helping him get rid of his clothes too until they're both naked and pressed against each other in an embrace, Sunggyu trailing kisses down Woohyun's neck to his shoulder and admiring the way Woohyun jumps under his touch. 

They eventually end up falling on the floor and the proximity and intimacy become somehow overwhelming to Sunggyu, his breathing turning ragged and his fingers clasping Woohyun's arms harder than he intends to. "Is this alright?" Woohyun asks tentatively as his hand is traveling down Sunggyu's stomach. He's looking at him with dilated pupils and lips glossing and swollen and this can't be anything other than perfectly right. Sunggyu nods, swallowing hard and burying his head in Woohyun's neck where he's sweating and his vein is pulsing hard against his cheek.

And then Woohyun is touching him, pulling at his cock so fast he has to straighten himself up because his muscles are clenching too hard. Sunggyu moans, loud and clear, his gasps changing into whines and Woohyun looks at him, kisses him to swallow all the sounds he lets out and Sunggyu thinks he might just come too early.

The room is steamy and Sunggyu is sweating but he doesn't care much because all he can think of is Woohyun's hands on him and how he never felt that good before. He shakily reaches for Woohyun too, wrapping his fingers around his throbbing member and he sees Woohyun's eyes rolling and his head falling backwards as his panting turns into moans. 

Woohyun's precum is leaking on his fingers and he suddenly feels the urge to thrust into Woohyun's hand, his hips buckling, seeking for his release relentlessly. Woohyun is trembling too, leaning against him, licking and mouthing his shoulder and letting out groans which keep increasing until Sunggyu can feel him pulsing in his hand. "Woohyun-," Sunggyu squeaks but then Woohyun's mouth is pressing against his own and they're coming all over their chests and hands, breathing heavy and bodies becoming pliant under the power of their orgasm.

\--

"When did you start liking games so much?," Woohyun inquires as they're sitting next to the pool, their feet dangling into the water and sipping beer. They earned a lot tonight thanks to Woohyun who managed to bring some riches players around. 

"I always did," Sunggyu answers, coming to rest his head on Woohyun's shoulder and letting his eyes follow their distorted limbs into the water. "I used to play with a friend when I was young." Sunggyu admits and Woohyun hums.

"A friend? What friend?" He doesn't know any of Sunggyu's friends because he doesn't have any and it's probably the first time they evoke their past anyway.

"A friend who moved out years ago." 

\--

Sunggyu is late tonight even though if it's their last game and that's how he sees the car parked in front. Months ago he wouldn't have been alarmed, he wouldn't even have noticed it but hanging out with Woohyun made him attentive to this kind of stuff. It isn't that suspicious at first, but then Sunggyu's eyes catch the lights on the dashboard and he's sure someone is waiting inside. He hesitates for a few seconds on whether he should enter or go back to his place before it's too late but he knows Woohyun is inside and he can't let him alone if he's in trouble. 

When he enters and hears shouts coming from further away, he starts running, suddenly panicked, legs shaking and mind blank. He opens the door to the swimming pool in a hurry, almost breaking the knob and his eyes fall on Woohyun arguing with another guy. He never saw him around before but he looks menacing, way older than them with clenched fists and face crumpled in anger. 

Sunggyu approaches and picks up what they've been arguing about. It is what both of them feared for months; being discovered. The guy is asking Woohyun for his money back, threatening to report them to the police and Woohyun looks at him with a confused face, trying to calm him down, saying that they will find a solution. But there's none because they did cheat and they did scam those people, and there is no way they will give their money back, not when they are so close to leave all this and have a good life of their own. 

"You don't have any evidences anyway," Woohyun counters as Sunggyu near them and the guy curses him out. He can't believe how calm Woohyun is when this guy might just be the end of them. Sunggyu, on the contrary, is agitated and want to stop what is about to happen.

\--

Woohyun's nose is bleeding and he keeps wiping it with the back of his hand. He says it doesn't hurt but Sunggyu is worried his nose might be broken. 

"Listen," Woohyun says, stopping on his tracks and face more serious than ever, "I'm sorry it has to come to this." He looks suddenly shy, uncomfortable even. Sunggyu doesn't want him to feel sorry, he was the one who accepted all of this and he enjoyed every moments. 

"You don't have to be," he replies, reaching to stroke Woohyun's cheek but he jerks away. 

"It's better if we stop here, okay? I never wanted things to go that way or us to end like this and I didn't even see that coming and I'm really sorry." He takes a deep breath and Sunggyu isn't sure he's understanding. "I'm sorry I couldn't help you become a better person. I'm really sorry." Woohyun's voice is now barely above a whisper.

"Wait," Sunggyu interrupts, horror taking over him, "Are you breaking up with me?," he asks, realizing suddenly, anger riling up inside him, "Because of that guy?"

"I'm sorry," Woohyun repeats, "But don't believe it's only because of what happened today. It's because I don't have a good influence on you, I made you do and imagine things that weren't real and because of that, it's best if we end it here." His voice cracks at the end and Sunggyu has trouble controlling the tremor taking over his body and his nails digging in his palms.

"You can't be serious. Please tell me you're not serious." Sunggyu begs, his hands pushing at Woohyun's chest to make him react, to make him come to his senses. 

"I'm sorry," he says once again and Sunggyu looses it, his fist landing on his face and anger so strong inside him he doesn't know what he's doing anymore. 

 

When he sees Woohyun at his feet with a bloody face and looking at him with horror in his eyes, Sunggyu begs again, "Tell me you're lying. Tell me you're staying. You can't leave me like this," he repeats until his throat hurts and he can't talk anymore and then he hits Woohyun again or he hugs him tight he isn't sure anymore but when his sobs calm down and he looks under him, Woohyun remains inert, eyes open but empty and chest so still it's scary.

Sunggyu bolts up, stumbling, taking steps backwards and realization hitting him; Woohyun's dead. He killed Woohyun. He looks down at his hands and they're red and then back at Woohyun's unmoving body which appears suddenly so small and so fragile lying there in front of him. 

 

\----

 

The first time Woohyun goes to volunteer, he's nervous. He has never done something like this before and is scared he'll say something wrong, but the nurses are nice and explain that he'll only have to take care of easy-going patients. They make him sit in front of a young man with small eyes and golden hair who looks bored and annoyed, biting his lips and fiddling with the hem of his gown. 

He's supposed to help him doing simple manual work or play with him. It's a part of the occupational therapy the patients have to go through. It's meant to avoid boredom and the periods of withdrawals. Woohyun isn't sure what Sunggyu likes so he offers to play cards. The nurse informed him that Sunggyu likes games a lot. So Woohyun takes a deck of card out of his pocket and deals out. Sunggyu is looking at him with interest, frowning slightly and his head cocked but he keeps dealing anyway.

"Let's start," Woohyun offers once he's done and Sunggyu nods. 

 

On his third visit and when he hears from the nurse that Sunggyu likes him and asked to play with him again, Woohyun dares to ask what he's suffering from. The doctor answers that he has been diagnosed with a delusional disorder a few years ago and was forced to stay at the hospital after he tried to arm himself. Woohyun isn't really sure what it means but he can't believe it when he looks at Sunggyu resting his head on his hand and shuffling the cards distractedly. "We're very glad you're getting on so well with him," the doctor congratulates him with a pat on the shoulder. "Usually patient like him suffers from withdrawals and are quite sensitive to others, but you're the first one he's enjoying his time with like this." Woohyun thanks him and glances at Sunggyu who's pouting while waiting for him to come back and start the next game. 

 

On his tenth visit, Woohyun takes a nurse by the arm and asks her what kind of gift Sunggyu would like to receive. He wants to make him a gift to congratulate him on getting better and better at interacting with people. He has hope Sunggyu can fully recover.

"Oh he has really childlike taste!," the nurse exclaims. "Games and toys and those kind of things." 

Woohyun brings a little red car he bought two days ago at a little shop. The car is shiny and vintage-like and he thinks it'll fit Sunggyu perfectly. Indeed, Sunggyu's eyes open wide, his face breaking into a smile and he takes the toy carefully in his hand to make it ride on the table. "It's amazing, Woohyun," he tells him with watery eyes and an intense look of admiration. 

"It's okay, I thought you deserved it." He smiles at him.

 

Woohyun is late today because he got stuck in the traffic. He's worried Sunggyu might be waiting for him so he starts running as soon as he gets off the taxi. It's the last time he's coming after the doctor told him it was better that way. They discovered that Woohyun's visits have made Sunggyu rather unstable and it would be better to stop. Woohyun is sad in a way because he grew to enjoy playing games with Sunggyu and the time they spent together. "Sunggyu's childhood friend killed himself when he was thirteen," the doctor told him with a professional detachment that made Woohyun's flinches. "They used to play cards and games together until one day when they got into a fight and Sunggyu told him that he could go kill himself because he wouldn't care." Woohyun doesn't want to know. He doesn't want to see Sunggyu like this. "The problem is that he really did and Sunggyu has been eating up by the guilt since then. He can't accept what happened. He fell into denial of the situation years ago and that's when he was diagnosed with a delusional disorder." Woohyun doesn't know how it's possible for somehow who looks so innocent to be so broken inside. He nods politely to the doctor. "What is happening with you is that he's rewriting his own story like he wanted it to happen with that friend." Woohyun should have noticed that Sunggyu wasn't really there when they were playing, that he wasn't treating Woohyun as the student who volunteers to play with him every week. 

The doctor tells Woohyun that he has to tell Sunggyu he's leaving, it might help him but he's anxious. Sunggyu's fragile and has been unstable the past few weeks. It's his fault he thinks. Sunggyu grew attached. Sunggyu fell in love with the Woohyun he created.

 

The doctor's gown has blood on it when he enters and Woohyun fears something bad might have happened. He rushes by his side but he simply puts a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry, Sunggyu just got a bit out of control when we told him it might be better if you stopped seeing him but he's fine now," he explains while Woohyun searches the room for Sunggyu. "You can go say goodbye. We think it might help him if you're the one pulling him out of his world. We'll be around if you need help." Woohyun swallows difficulty and tries to calm himself. He never intended his volunteering sessions with Sunggyu to make him worse than ever. The doctor says it can happen with patient like him, that he shouldn't worry but Woohyun worries because he should have noticed it earlier, when Sunggyu started insisting on playing poker, when he talked about swimming pools and games shop and love and Woohyun just ignored it because he didn't understand. 

 

Woohyun repeats he's sorry a thousand times but Sunggyu doesn't hear. Sunggyu is angry, tears falling and he says Woohyun is leaving, Woohyun never loved him and it's true but Woohyun can't seem to find anything to say beside "I'm sorry". 

Dongwoo, the nurse, tells him to leave after a while because they need to calm Sunggyu down, that he might get violent and Woohyun obeys, glancing one last time toward the frail man with small eyes and then he's out of the hospital, out in the morning sun and Sunggyu's voice gets stuck in his head, "please tell me you're lying, you can't leave me like this".


End file.
